Quantum Jumping

Quantum Jumping can go jump.

Quantum Jumping
The Quantum Jumping Box

Quantum Jumping.  The idea behind this several hundred dollar “course” is that we can learn to mentally jump into alternate universes and get advice and insight from more successful happier versions of ourselves in those alternate universes.  There’s so much wrong with this idea I barely know where to begin.

Firstly, I originally visited this website a while ago (link sent to me by an online friend) and back then it was just one of those standard, simple, mostly-white, long-scrolling, selling pages – the same template used by people selling DIY Solar Panels and One Weird Tip for Losing That Belly diets etc etc.  But today I saw a Facebook ad for it, remembered seeing it a while back, and visited it again only to see that the site has now been upgraded with fancy graphics and custom layout.  This suggests to me that the course is selling well and making money — how depressing that something so obviously full of hot air could actually make money.  Once again I find myself realising that I’m in the wrong business, or that I have too many scruples. Or both.

Secondly, what if it’s true?  What if there are multiple universes, many of which with alternate Skevs living in them?  Am I okay with the idea that there are potentially infinite numbers of universes, each with their own Skev, each more successful than me?  It’s cold comfort that there are presumably just as many or even more universes with worse-off Skevs.  Or already-dead Skevs.  Or never-existed Skevs.

Thirdly, what if I Quantum Jump to another universe to ask the fabulously successful, happy and wealthy Skevos that lives in that universe for advice, and he just tells me to “Get lost, loser!”?

Fourthly, what if I’m ALREADY living in the universe which has the Skevos that is maximally happy and successful — that is — me, what if this is as good as it can possibly get for me in all universes?  What a terrifying thought.

Fifthly, if Quantum Jumping is possible and I’m a relatively successful Skev, then I shall soon be constantly hassled by Quantum Jumping Loser-Skevs from other universes whining about their lives and asking for advice.  I reckon I’d tell them to get lost, bunch of losers.

Lastly, and depressingly, if Quantum Jumping IS possible, then the unavoidable fact is — not a single alternate Skev has ever Quantum Jumped into this universe to ask me for my advice.  This means I must be one of the least, if not the very least, successful Skevs out of all the infinite Skevs in all the infinite universes.



I just tried Omegle (chatting with strangers) for the first time.  I don’t think I’m the target audience.  This is the transcript of my first (and probably last) conversation on Omegle:

Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Horny gurl? ;D
You: Hello
You: Ah, no, I’m not a horny girl.
Stranger: That’s a shame. : (
You: Sorry to disappoint
You: I’m not sure I get omegle
Stranger: Are you a girl?
You: No, I am neither horny nor a girl.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think I now get what Omegle is really for. 🙂

Star Wars Meets Dallas – “Dallas Wars”? “Stallas”?

It probably only works for people my age or older, but this YouTube video of the opening credits for Star Wars done in the style of the TV series Dallas made me smile.  I particularly like the way the creator used a shot of Tarkin turning around for his credit – Old School!  The whole thing was inspired by this Star Trek one.

Time Travel Convention

Here’s a cute idea from one of the boffins at MIT – hold a time travel convention! After all, you only need to hold one convention as time travellers from all ages could attend the one event, as long as they found out about it. So now everyone is supposedly spreading the word so that one day in the future, time travellers will see the invitation and decide to pop back to 2005 to attend. I found the link via Instapundit.

Here’s an idea – anyone with an identical twin sibling could have some fun. One of you show up ot the time travel convention looking normal and sane, but complaining about how few people there are attending. Then your twin rushes in wearing a futuristic suit and tells there other self “You fool, the convention is in another parallel universe, not this one, they are waiting for me… us!”, and then rush out.

Super Nerd

I like The Onion, it’s a funny site. But when I read this short article entitled “Nerd Has Most Obscure Crush Ever” it caught my eye. The article starts:

    JACKSONVILLE, FL—The unrequited nature of area nerd June Manzo’s crush on actor Peter Tuddenham, who provides the voice of piloting computer Slave on Blake’s 7, is only slightly more agonizing than the process of explanation she must put herself through every time her media obsession is discussed.

And at this point I thought to myself, “Surely, if she had a crush on Peter Tuddenham, it wouldn’t have been for his Slave voice in particular, as that was only one of the characters he gave voice to, a character that only existed in the final fourth season. Surely she would have developed her crush because Tuddenham also, and more famously, did the voices for the original ship’s computer, Zen, in the earlier seasons, as well as the voice for the portable super-computer Orac throughout the whole series (well, except for Orac’s first episode, where the actor who played Orac’s creator did the voice).”

Then I started to wonder if the author of the piece knew of this error and only put it there to entice B7 fans out into the light. At this point I realised that thinking all this, even knowing this information, meant that I was a bigger sadder nerd than the fictional Ms Manzo, so I went to bed.